Thursday, February 16, 2006

Growing Up, Too Fast!

Last night as I layed beside my little girl, we were having our chat before bedtime, catching up on the day's activities. This is the time she tells me about her day, what's going at school, exciting news, how she is feeling, what she learned or just plain girl-bitch about friends or girls who pretend to be friends with her. We ended up on a topic about this girl, let's call her "Egg", and how these two seem to have alternating conflicts. Now, I ONLY get the one sided story, Kay's side, but Egg seems to have some self esteem issues. Egg is new to the city, she's born in another country, her English is not that good and she carries quite an accent. Everything must seem new to her. She also seems to be trying very hard to be a part of their group, siding with whomever she feels she wants to be friends with. I am sure she is a nice girl with a nice family. But Kay and Egg seem to always get into these little minor conflicts. This is not the first, second or third time she has moaned about Egg. But last night, she lashed out at Egg, saying she was a stupid girl. Now, WE have taught her to be respectful of others and normally, Kay doesn't speak like this. But I guess something else must have happened and this time Kay just lost her emotions. I told her she shouldn't speak this way of her and even if she and others talk about each other behind their back, Kay shouldn't. I explained this is how rumors begin and it's not nice to talk about someone because karma always comes back around. Would she like it if she found out someone else was talking bad about her? Kay has always been a very sensitive girl and she started to get upset with me. I didn't feel that I was lecturing her, although she stated that I was and got more upset. I told her that she shouldn't stoop to the levels of others because she should have more respect for herself and other people. Sometimes, people are just like that and she will meet many over her lifetime but she needs to learn how to deal. At our house, we have a rule, never go to bed upset or angry with each other but last night, I could not convince her otherwise and we ended up going to bed upset. More she than I.

I know it's hard, she's a girl and she's dealing with alot on her plate, like turning into a teenager and other happenings in her life. I am no longer the "cool mom" but the mom who lectures. *sigh* I remember like it was yesterday, when she and her little friends thought I was the coolest mom in the whole wide world :)

Also, coming back to memory are the days of growing up, the changes my body went through, my emotions, my self esteem, and *sarcastic* the FUN days of highschool.... I, as the parent, really am trying to deal with her changes. It's an exciting time and a difficult time for both parent and child. Some days are better than others but I do see the dramatic and drastic changes going through my little Kay *sniff sniff*

But I do hope, in the end, that everything we taught her will stay with her (even if it's in the back of her mind) and although at this moment she is still upset with me and feels she cannot confide in me, my door is forever opened to her, she just needs to step in.....

*SIGH* It's hard being a parent of a tweenage daughter. Much harder than I anticipated.....

PS *sun shining* This morning, Kay seemed to have forgotten or maybe pretend to have forgotten, our conversation last night. We gave each other a kiss and said our goodbyes and she wished me a great day. I hope she will feel much better after hanging out with her girlfriends for the day (they have a Pro-D day).... that's another post for another time... (she's now heading out to the MALL with her friends and I am so worried but like I said another post for another day.....)

1 comment:

Kami said...

I just wouldn't know what to do with one of those tween people!!